The Michelangelo phenomenon has an opposite side.
Partners don't always support each other's ideal selves.
A partner can reinforce characteristics that someone doesn't particularly want, discourage goals, or treat them according to an outdated version of who they are.
Over time, that can create tension between personal growth and the relationship.
This is why “they love me exactly as I am” isn't always enough if the relationship prevents either person from developing.
Healthy support doesn't require designing your partner's future for them.
It's more about recognizing the future they want for themselves and helping rather than obstructing it.
Sometimes compatibility isn't only about who two people are today—it's also about whether their futures can grow together.
© Personality and Social Psychology Review
Partners don't always support each other's ideal selves.
A partner can reinforce characteristics that someone doesn't particularly want, discourage goals, or treat them according to an outdated version of who they are.
Over time, that can create tension between personal growth and the relationship.
This is why “they love me exactly as I am” isn't always enough if the relationship prevents either person from developing.
Healthy support doesn't require designing your partner's future for them.
It's more about recognizing the future they want for themselves and helping rather than obstructing it.
Sometimes compatibility isn't only about who two people are today—it's also about whether their futures can grow together.
© Personality and Social Psychology Review