PHDestroyahh
Forum Veteran
Hello guys, I just want to let my problems out , since alam ko pag kinimkim to baka hindi na ako makarecover pag napunta ako sa suicidal state, I dont know if I'm depress or what , but everyday I feel useless, demotivated and thinks that I'm being left behind, seeing my friends and former classmates succeeding in their own chosen career , and me is just sitting here and watching them succeed and live the life they really want to be. nag apply naman na ako halos higit isang buwan kaso walang tumanggap sakin. and that even made my mental health issue worse. and also my family instead they lift me up, they just throw some gossips that I'm not the child that they are expecting me to become, like sinasbi nila taas ng expectation sakin ng mother ko eh hindi naman daw ako matalino, and mahina talaga ang utak ko, while my mother is pushing me to find a work that can support her since malapit na raw syang mag retire as maid, and I think she sees me as a retirement plan. kaya iniisip ko parang wala na akong kakampi sa mundong ito. I even doubt the plan of god to me, na parang wala nang tulong ang dadating. every night I always cry even right now tang haling tang hali eh lumuluha ako habang ginagwa ko itong post na to. kasi hindi ko na po talaga alam gagawin ko po eh, nag rereview ako for CSE kaso hinid ako maka focus since ang laki ng pressure sakin and pag pumalya ako back to zero na naman and uulanin na naman ako ng batikos , and worse galing pa sa mga family members ko ang mga degrading words. Kaya sa mga makakabasa neto please give me some advice kahit konti lang po basta mabigyan lang ako ng liwanag at panibagong pag asa