Start with making a dummy accounts sa mga social medias and create your small circle of friends there. Hindi din need na magpakilala don since anounymously speaking is way more easier kasi free kang sabihin ang gusto mo without them knowing who you are. Ganyan din ako so alam ko yung feeling na laging nag iisa. I've been living my whole 18 yrs of existence with that feeling. Yung feeling mo walang nakakaintindi sayo, like ikaw lang talaga mag isa. Pero through this method madami kang madi-discover sa sarili mo. And about naman sa suicidal thoughts, well for me normal nalang sakin ang magkameron niyan tho ito lang din masasabi ko, if you end your life, wala na, yun na yon. Pero kung iintayin mo yung time where you can do the things that you want sa buhay mo, madaming pwedeng gawin diba? You don't have to be so positive in life, all you need is to calm your self and have a piece of mind. I hope nakatulong ako. Sana di mo gawin yung mga bagay na pagsisihan mo. Sinsabi ko sayo, masakit magpakamatay.