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funny jokes

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    🔒 Closed Babalik na ko sa pag iinom (old jokes)

    Every 2nd glass of beer reduces life by 5 minutes Each s3x trip increases life by 10 minutes. So basic equation is: Ang lasenggo na mahilig sa s3x matagal mamatay….
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    🔒 Closed Brainless Show part 6 (old jokes)

    Host: What "K" (kalabaw) is the national animal of the Philippines? Contestant: Kuto? Host : Hinde. Clue, it tills the land. Contestant : Kutong Lupa!
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    🔒 Closed Dosage of Vi@gra (old jokes)

    Dosage of Viagra: With new GF = ½ tab With mistress = 1 tab With wife = 1 tab + X rated Film + soup number 5 + ginseng + bachus + siling labuyo + talaba + calendar ni Kylie Verzosa
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    🔒 Closed Brainless Show part 5 (old jokes)

    Host: What "S" (Sampaguita) is the national flower of the Philippines ? Contestant: Sunflower? Host : Hindi. Binebenta ito sa kalye. Contestant: Stork? Host: Hindi. Bulaklak sabi eh. Contestant: Sitsarong bulaklak? Host: Hindi pa rin. It ends with a letter "A". Contestant: Sitsarong...
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    🔒 Closed Smart si Inday (old jokes)

    Sir: inday si sir mo ito.. nabangga ang kotse ko at I need cash Inday: Aru! Dugo-dugo gang ka noh?? Sir: G@ga! Si sir mo ito!!!! Inday: G@go!! Si sir ang tawag sa kin CUPCAKE!!!
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    🔒 Closed Brainless Show part 4 (old jokes)

    Host: Anong "S" (Salbabida) ang ginagamit na flotation device sa dagat upang hindi ka malunod? Contestant: Sirena? Host : Hindi! Hindi ito babae. Contestant : Siyokoy? Host : Hindi ito lalake. Contestant : Siyoke?
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    🔒 Closed My name is.... (old jokes)

    LALAKE: Miss, pwede makipagkilala??? Anong pangalan mo?? BABAE: CarMen… Kasi mahilig ako sa CAR at sa MEN… eh ikaw?? Anong pangalan mo??? LALAKE: PePe…
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    🔒 Closed Brainless Show part 3 (old jokes)

    Host: Anong "L" (Lifeguard) ang tawag sa tao na sumasagip sa iyo pag ikaw ay nalulunod? Contestant : Lifebuoy? Host: Hindi, pero kahawig nga ng pangalan ng sabon ang pangalang ito. Contestant : Safeguard? Host :Hindi, pagsamahin mo yung dalawang sagot mo. Contestant : Safe Buoy? Host...
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    🔒 Closed Brainless Show part 2 (old jokes)

    Host : Saan "B" (beach) tayo madalas pumunta pag summer upang maligo? Contestant: Banyo? Host : Hindi, pag pumunta ka doon, maaarawan ka. Contestant: Bubong? Host: Hindi, marami kang makikita duong mga babaeng naka-******. Contestant : Beerhouse!
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    🔒 Closed Sure tol. (old jokes)

    Juan: Pedro, nasaksak ako! Walang hinto ang agos ng dugo. Pls. call me a nurse!!! Pedro: sige, you’re a nurse! Nurse ka juan!!! Nurse ka!! Nurse kaaaa!!!!
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    🔒 Closed Brainless Show part 1 (old jokes)

    Host : Saan "B" (Bagumbayan) binaril si Jose Rizal? Contestant: Sa back? Host : O sige, puwede rin na ang simula ay letter "L" (Luneta). Contestant: Likod? Host: Hindi pa rin. Para mas madali, "R.P." ang initials ng modern name nito(Rizal Park ). Contestant: Rear Part? (Susme! Likod pa rin...
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    🔒 Closed Mr. Potato (old jokes)

    Sa palengke… Kumare1: alam mo mare, pag nakakakita ako ng patatas naaalala ko itlog ng mister ko!!! Kumare2: wow… bakit?? Dahil ba ganito kalaki?? Kumare1: hindi ah… ganyan KADUMI!!!!
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    🔒 Closed Away na naman (old jokes)

    Husband: Malamig na sinangag, matabang na kape, maalat na sabaw, paano ka ba naman gaganahan nito?? Wife: maasim na itlog, malambot na tit!, malaking tiyan, kala mo ba ginaganahan ako??!!! Tse!!!!
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    🔒 Closed Former Presidents (old jokes)

    PGMA: I am planning to STOP POVERTY and MASS STARVATION!!! Erap: alam mo Gloria yung POVERTY madaling pigilin, pero ang M@STURBAT!ON human rights violation yan!!!
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    🔒 Closed Tayuan na po sa bus (old jokes)

    Konduktor: Lola pasensya na po kasi puno na.. payag ba kayo patayo?? Lola: Tinamaan ka ng lintek!!! Kung inabot mo lang ang kabataan ko.. kahit PATUWAD pwede!!!
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    🔒 Closed Sumbungin naman (old jokes)

    In an anatomy exam, the teacher asks the class to draw a female reproductive organ… one girl feels shy and looks down…. Then a boy shouts…. “sir oh… may kodigo!!!”
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    🔒 Closed May point naman (old jokes)

    A Kolehiyala was interviewed... Question: what's the difference between a p3nis and a Kamote? Kolehiyala: yak naman!!! as in hellooo?? I don't eat kamote noh.. how can i compare?!
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    🔒 Closed Confident si Tatay (old jokes)

    Anak: Tay mag-ingat kayo sa DANK TRAK.. Tatay: anong dantrak?? Anak: yung pong trak na sampu ang gulong na karga buhangin… Tatay: hindi dantrak yan… “TEN MILLER!!”
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    🔒 Closed Let's talk about our future honey (old jokes)

    Mr: pag namatay ka.. isusulat ko sa nitso mo.. “ Malamig noong buhay… mas malamig noong namatay!!” Mrs: Ah ganon ba??? Sa nitso mo naman ilalagay ko.. “ Sa wakas tumigas din!!!”
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    🔒 Closed Curious si junakis (old jokes)

    Dalagita: Mom, totoo ba na kung saan pinasok ang ari ng lalaki dun din lumalabas ang baby?? Mom: oo anak..totoo un!!! Dalagita: Di kaya masira ang tonsil ko paglabas ng baby ko??
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