PH
Couples don't always perceive each other with perfect accuracy.
Research on romantic relationships has distinguished actual similarity from perceived similarity.
People can believe their partner shares more of their attitudes, values, or characteristics than objective comparisons show.
Interestingly, perceived similarity can sometimes be more closely connected with relationship satisfaction than actual similarity.
In other words, believing “we understand each other” may matter even when two people's personalities aren't objectively identical.
This doesn't mean differences should be ignored.
But feeling aligned can be psychologically different from literally matching on every trait.
© Journal of Personality and Social Psychology